I realize disgraced Pastor Ted Haggard is old news, but I happened to come across this recent quote from him, which is awesome. Our pal Ted admitted in an interview with GQ that he was bisexual, and then said this:
“We never had sex sex,” he said of the affair. “I bought drugs and a massage from him, and he masturbated me at the end of it. That’s it.”
I like the last sentence. “That’s it.” I bought crystal meth from a dude, he gave me a massage, and then he jacked me off. That’s it. NOT A BIG DEAL, PEOPLE! Even an out and proud gay dude would have a hard time getting away with a ‘that’s it’ at the end of that sentence, let alone a super-hypocrite like Haggard.